The wedded future beckons

I’m 31, male, and about to get married.

Truth be told, although I’m elated that I’ll be wedded with the best wife I could ask for, I still shiver at the thought of the future. Something that’s planned for the “rest of my life” doesn’t come easy to me, who has in the past planned and executed life in a planned and concerted manner.

Sitting in my office seat, I dream about a family I can call my own; sipping a cup of green tea, I fantasize about the champaign on stage, and my own children drinking it at their wedding; Standing in the train grabbing the handle, I imagined holding my family together through rocky times and stationary times.

The world is unpredictable at best, all formulas of success in the previous generation has already been proven otherwise before my eyes. The goals to be a middle class citizen, faithful husband, caring father, loving son, a reliable breadwinner, etc. bears down on me. I often talk to my lovely wife-to-be for some comfort, but deep inside, no matter how, it’s unsettling.

It’s unsettling from the macro view – there’s little or no social safety being in a foreign country, despite the permanent residency status. Fragile global economies are poised to wipe out city states that are dependent on global trade, crushing effects on the environment and population growth promises lower quality of living, and greed continues to create an ever widening gap between the rich and poor. Should I be the richest of the poor or the poorest of the rich?

It’s also unsettling from the micro view – The place we will call home has just emptied my savings, her savings and probably more from friends and family no thanks to some politicians / civil servant’s academic analysis of the property market. We still haven’t the inkling of the full impact of raising children, as we’re currently facing downpayments for wedding venues and other services. Should I take higher risks for higher returns or go steady?

In situations like these, you might wonder if the financial plans that your financial planner laid down for you before you handed him your check for the life insurance policy actually made sense.

Here’s what makes sense to me currently:

1. Believing in myself will ultimately be the strength I need to pull this through (if you’re monotheistically religious, this is equivalent of you saying you do your best and leave the rest to God)

2. Trusting and counting on one another – creating the best husband and wife team – must be the priority, especially in making sure we’re both healthy and safe, and children is given the best we can afford.

3. While always having a plan B, never let an opportunity slip by without at least giving it a shot. Live without fear even when there’s no safety net in the world, but reach out for help without hesitating when in need.

Beyond these, it will be a long journey of discovery ahead. It’s time for adventure again, and I will share when I can.

An adventure where I will not be alone.